“We can either make a habit, or some habit will form and start making us,”—Ken Hughes
The other day someone on Facebook asked, “if you had to pick a song to be the theme song of your life, which would you choose?”
Several people commented that there were too many to choose, but I knew right away after reading it which song I’d pick. I already call this song the theme song for my life.
The song, Make Yourself, by Incubus, has been the theme song of my life for more than a decade now. Because the lyrics fit exactly what I believe about life—that you have to create who you want to be and what you want your life to be like.
Some of the lyrics…
“If I hadn’t made me
I would have been made somehow
If I hadn’t assembled myself
I’d have fallen apart by now
If I hadn’t made me
I’d be more inclined to bow
Powers that would be have swallowed me up
But that’s more than I can allow
If you let them make you
They’ll make you papier-mâché
At a distance you’re strong
Until the wind comes
Then you crumble and blow away…”
I consciously took the wheel of my life when I left for college at age 17 and went off on my own. But over the last few years as I’ve worked a lot more on my mindset, I’ve been consciously creating myself in a whole new way.
Which started with a total revamp of my habits (multiple times over).
The things we do every day are the things that are making our lives. The things we get used to; the things we do by default, those are the things we are living for.
Which means you’re either living for your writing dream and for doing the writing that will get you there… or you’re living for Resistance or procrastination or numbing out with food and TV or whatever else you’re doing in place of doing your writing.
The choice is always yours. You get to decide, every single day, what will make you.
Whatever habits you currently have—aka: the things you do daily—that’s what you’re giving your life for.
So the thing that needs to be looked at here is—what’s your default?
Because unless you’ve been intentional about your life and have created the things you want and the habits that will support you in getting it, you’re operating and living by default with whatever default programming you picked up throughout your life so far.
Really think about this one and don’t be afraid to take an honest look at the things you’re doing every day. It may even help to keep track of everything you do every day for a week and then look back at what you’re giving your life for.
If it does’t look how you want, it’s time to consider a habits overhaul.
To do this, just pick ONE habit… one thing that if you did it every day (or stopped doing it every day) a year from now would totally transform your life. And then start doing (or not doing) that habit every day.
Be consistent. Stick with it.
What you’ll find by changing one habit is not only will your life start to change, but you’ll want to add in more new habits (or continue removing old ones you no longer want).
But the best thing to do is to pick one to start with. You don’t want to try and change everything all at once or go cold-turkey on everything because that’s just setting yourself up for a setback.
Pick one thing. Choose something massively important that would actually transform your life. Do that one thing every day.
And can I make a recommendation? Choose the one thing that will totally change your writing life first (‘cause you know you want to!).
A couple months ago I tried to change EVERYTHING all at once. I started new daily writing habits, I changed my diet completely, I started new exercise habits…AHHH!!!
It was all too much too fast. My body went haywire and it took me almost 3 weeks to get back to feeling normal again.
So I decided to take a step back and just do one thing. I picked building a daily habit of doing my writing (blog post and work on my fiction) every morning first thing before I do anything else.
And I’ve kept it up. I’ve been on track for almost 2 months now with doing a daily blog post and working on my fiction. I give myself a break on the weekends, meaning I still make a point to write something, but I don’t force myself into it has to be a blog post or I have to work on my novel.
Usually that’s what I end up working on anyhow, but I give myself the freedom to write or work on whatever I want on the weekends, as long as I write something.
I’m starting to feel pretty stable with my daily mindset practice habit, as well as my daily writing habit. So I’m to add in some food-related habits, a little at a time.
Creating yourself exactly as you dream of being is a process. It doesn’t happen overnight.
The important part is that you make the decision that you will consciously create yourself and who you want to be, and not continue to live your life based on default programming that may or may not actually align with who you want to be.
Write with a purpose, live with intention,