This week was supposed to be the week I published my new eBook. I set a publish date for Tuesday (that was yesterday) and then I re-set a date for Thursday (that’s tomorrow).
But something was up. Something wasn’t feeling quite right.
At first I thought maybe it was just Resistance. That happens sometimes, even to an author who has hit publish 8 times.
Except it wasn’t that.
Yes, I was Resisting finishing the book… but not for my usual reasons. Usually if I Resist it’s because I know I need to put the book out there.
But this time felt different.
Something was going on deep inside me. I had that feeling I often get when I’m on the verge of a revelation or a major shift of some kind.
I felt annoyed and pissed off. I couldn’t sit still. I felt like there was something bubbling inside me that needed to come out.
So I sat down and I did some journaling. And then I finally discovered what was going on.
I was Resisting because… THIS ISN’T THE BOOK I’M SUPPOSED TO PUBLISH.
I knew it was true the minute it came up, because it felt right. I felt like I immediately got back into alignment with my writing dream.
For 17 days now, I’ve been writing an eBook about how to write a really good eBook. And yeah, it was a decent start. But it just wasn’t feeling right to me.
And that’s because the topic is not in alignment with who I am and what I’m meant to be writing books about.
I’m meant to be writing books for writers about alignment, motivation, inspiration, mindset and getting shit done. All of the books I’ve written so far–and all of the ones I’ve had become best sellers–are aligned with those topics.
All of them.
And that’s not to say I shouldn’t step out of my comfort zone. I should.
But there’s a difference between stepping out of your comfort zone on something you know you’re meant to be doing… and forcing yourself to do something that’s not really in alignment with who you are.
This book made me feel stuck and not in flow, which is the complete opposite of how my books make me feel.
And yes, I can absolutely teach someone how to write an eBook. I’ve done it 8 times now. But my journaling last night led me to one very simple conclusion: I DO NOT want to write books about how to write books.
So I decided to let it go. To go with my gut and listen to myself.
Yes, I did mention the book to quite a few people and I will have to explain to them my decision. But regardless of what they think or the reasons they think I’m doing it… I know the truth.
I choose to create my dream writing life all on my terms. And that sometimes means trusting your gut and knowing what you’re meant to be doing. (Or not doing.)
The outside world will tell you that this is wrong. That you should never “listen to your gut” or “trust your intuition” when making business decisions.
But that’s how I roll. It’s the only way I can roll.
Because here’s one thing I do know… You can’t be a successful author writing and publishing books that aren’t aligned with who you are.