P.S. If you’re ready to do what you love and create a daily habit around it, be sure to check out the recording of my Writing Life Rehab workshop. It’s available until 11:59 p.m. EDT tonight for the same price as the live workshop (price doubles at midnight!!).
About six months ago I found out that I’m moving to Austin this summer. My husband is in a band and they all decided that it was time to get serious about being full-time musicians and that we needed to live somewhere much more condusive to that goal.
I immediately got on board and decided that I’d be totally cool with moving if I could have everything I want… an apartment with upgraded features, like hardwood floors and granite counter tops; cool amenities like a pool, a gym and a place where I could go write every day; living close to water; having a city view; and being walking distance to cool stuff, like coffee shops, restaurants and bars.
A pretty tall order. But I was set on it. So I started to visualize myself living that exact experience.
Every day for the last six months I’d write all about what I wanted in my journal. And then during my visualization practice I’d imagine me and my husband and dog living that life. I’d see myself getting up in the morning, taking the dog for a walk around the lake, then going home to do my mindset practice before packing up my laptop to head to the apartment common area so I could work on my daily blog post, fiction writing and all the other things I work on every day. I’d see myself finishing my morning work and then going to the gym or swimming laps in the pool, before heading back to my apartment for a shower and lunch.
I’d imagine this scenario over and over again every day. Some days I’d actually walk myeslf through that exact routine in my mind as I visualized. Other days I’d just spend time feeling the emotions of having everything I want right now.
I did this daily for six months straight.
Then this week, my husband and I took our dog on a road trip to Austin to check things out and do some apartment hunting. Before we left we researched a bunch of places we wanted to see and that we thought looked like a good place to live.
Then the other day we drove to all of the apartments we found online to take a look, including one that we had an appointment scheduled at. Everything we saw was OK, but it wasn’t quite what we really wanted.
And then something magical happened…
We were driving out of the apartment complex we just finished visiting, got turned around somehow in the parking lot and ended up going out the wrong exit. And that exit led to a street we’d hadn’t been on yet. While we tried to figure out where we were, we both noticed an apartment complex we hadn’t seen online.
Something about it just looked right. You could feel the positive vibes just by looking at it. So we pulled into the parking lot and went into the leasing office to ask some questions and check things out.
And not only did this apartment complex have all of the features and amenities I wanted (including in-apartment laundry!!), but it was also a 10-minute walk from the lake and a 10-minute drive into downtown.
Not only that, but you can see a view of the city from the parking lot. AND there’s a Starbucks within walking distance where I can go work every day if I want to.
It felt totally meant to be, especially with the Starbucks being so close, because I’ve always had a secret desire to be able to work at a coffee shop every day.
And that’s when I realized the Universe had delivered everything I’d been visualizing for the past six months. And the crazy part is, I wasn’t even visualizing the Starbucks and yet the Universe still delivered it to me!!
THIS is what it means to create something in your mind, to see it, to visualize it, to feel it like it’s already real (even when it’s not yet) and then to have it manifest in your life.
Your mind is the most powerful tool you have at your disposal to create your life exactly how you want it to be. But you have to use it and you have to be consistent with it and you have to keep on going, even if you’re not seeing the results of it yet.
I spent six months visualizing the life I wanted to create for us in Austin. And now that life is starting to come into reality. I’m more excited about this move than I’ve been about any move I’ve made so far in my life (and I’ve made many–I’ve lived in several places in NY, SoCal and Houston).
The best part is, I totally created it with my mind. That’s where it started. Now it’s actually showing up in my real life. Now I’m able to see it and touch it and hold it in my hands.
And do you want to know something pretty awesome? You can do this same creation process with ANYTHING that you want to create in your life. ANYTHING!!!!
It may not happen overnight and it may take time for it to actually show up in your reality, but if you stick with it and keep going, it will happen.
So, what do you really want right now? Get clear on it, then spend 3-5 minutes a day visualizing it and feeling it as already done, and not long from now it will be.
Write with a purpose, live with intention,
P.S. It’s the FINAL DAY to join us for the Writing Life Rehab masterclass happening tomorrow Saturday April 22 at 2 p.m. EST!! If you’re ready to drop the excuses and stop putting your writing off so you can finally step into being the writer and author you’ve always wanted to be, you do not want to miss this workshop.
And even if you can’t attend live, sign up anyhow! I’ll be sending out a replay of the workshop after it’s done.
1. Decide What You Want
2. Tell Yourself How You Want It to Be
3. Bring On the Gratitude
4. See It As Normal
5. Keep Going
A life coach that I follow online once posted something on Facebook where she talked about the kinds of music people listen to. She said if your life is awesome and you’re happy, you most likely listen to upbeat, festival-type music that’s peppy and has positive lyrics. But if you’re listening to country music, for example, or music with not so happy lyrics, that could actually be why your life isn’t working as well as it could.
And I get what she was saying with this—that you attract things to your life based on how you think and speak. I agree with that and whole-heartedly believe it and live it.
What I disagreed with is the idea that just because a song has negative lyrics that means listening to it or singing along with it would cause your life to be negative too.
I listen to rock music (mostly from the grunge era), and if you know anything about rock music, the lyrics aren’t exactly peppy. Usually the lyrics are angry or expressing a negative emotion or experience.
But that doesn’t mean my life is negative. The exact opposite, in fact. My life is always better when I’m listening to the music that makes my soul happy.
Grunge rock does that for me. It brings me back to a simpler time in life when I was growing up and falling in love with music for the first time (as I’ve fallen in love with music many times over the years).
That always evokes a happy feeling in me. And singing the words out loud—even negative words—helps me amp that happy feeling up even more.
It has often been said that words have power. And they absolutely do. But where the power really comes from isn’t just from the words being used.
It’s the feeling behind the words. The feeling is what makes the words powerful.
When you say, “I hate you” there’s a feeling behind those words. When you say, “I’m not good enough,” there’s a feeling behind those words. And the feeling that’s behind the words is what really matters.
Because you can say the words, “I’m happy,” but if you’re not actually feeling happy inside, the words don’t have the same power as when you say, “I’m happy,” and actually are.
The whole thing with law of attraction and manifesting the things you want in your life, is that words matter. But they don’t matter as much as feelings.
Feelings are actually the biggest deciding factor in what manifests. Because feelings create energy—either positive or negative. And energy is what attracts things.
Which means the lyrics of the music you listen to—or the words you speak—only matter if they’re creating a bad feeling in you.
Example… when you’re young and you get your heart broken for the first time, you listen to all those sappy love songs that make you think about the one who got away. That is when music and lyrics are causing negative energy and negative things to manifest. Because your focus is on lack and being not enough and feeling bad.
But if you have a playlist that you love to sing to and that brings a feeling of joy to you, for example, then no matter what the lyrics say, you will feel good. And the feeling good creates good energy that attracts positive things.
This distinction is MASSIVELY important. It could just change your whole life.
For a long time I worried about the words I was singing out loud as I sang along to my favorite songs. Or the words I’d say by default because of my subconscious programming. But now I know better.
It’s the feelings that matter, not the words.
And yeah, it’s true that some words just come with certain feelings. So if you’re saying “I’m not good enough” or “I can’t do that,” it’s very likely that’s what you’ll experience in your reality and attract to your life (more situations where you feel that way).
But when you’re feeling amazing inside, you can say the words, “I’m not good enough” and they won’t even penetrate you, because you’ll feel so deeply in the moment that they’re not true.
This same thing applies to thoughts.
Law of attraction says that whatever you think about you will attract to your life. And again, I don’t disagree with this. But there’s a distinction to be made, because it’s not about the specific thoughts.
It’s about the feelings that the thoughts create.
And yes, certain thoughts will come with certain feelings, good and bad. But you have the power. Power that extends far past the words you’re hearing in your head.
You have the power to create whatever feelings you want to feel. All day every day.
Now that’s not to say you won’t have life chaos happen that tries to change how you’re feeling, you will. But if you don’t let it get to you, and you keep that happy, positive feeling inside, then no matter what happens it won’t penetrate you.
I create the happy, positive, empowering feelings that I want to feel every single day by doing my daily mindset practice, which includes freestyle journaling to get the crap out of my head, then writing affirmations declaring who I am and that my dream life is already real, and then I finish up with 5-7 minutes of visualization where I walk myself through my ideal day, weaving in as much of my dream stuff as I can (like the car I want to drive, where I want to live, the kind of activities I do, etc).
Those feelings then carry themselves into my day. And so long as I don’t allow anything else to change those feelings (yes, it IS a choice to allow something to affect you), they stay with me all day long.
This took some time to build up to. In the beginning I’d feel the good feelings for a little while and then life chaos or worry would take over and I’d be back to feeling bad. But I just kept working on it.
At one point, I was doing 2+ hours of mindset work a day. Sometimes I still do. And every minute has been worth it.
My daily mindset practice has helped me to focus my mind and get my emotions in check, so I can go through my day feeling great and manifesting great things as a result of feeling that way.
And when I’m feeling like that, no negative lyric (or thought) in the world can change it 🙂
Write with a purpose, live with intention,
P.S. It’s the FINAL DAYS to join my upcoming workshop—FINISH Your Damn Novel: 30-days of kick-ass motivation, inspiration, accountability and getting-writing-done for writers who’ve started a novel (draft or revision) and want to FINISH. We start April 1 (that’s Saturday!!).
And… I’ve added a new EXTENDED PAYMENT PLAN! Because I want to make it super easy for you to say HELL YES and join us!
This workshop is perfect for you if you’re sick of never finishing or sick of taking so long to finish and you just want to get your damn novel (draft or revision) FINISHED so you can finally move on to the next step in the process.
I’ll be revising my novel along with you over the 30 days, as well as sending you daily motivational emails, doing livestreams throughout each week in the private workshop Facebook group to keep you moving along and overcoming all the stuff that tries to get in the way of you finishing (stuff like, life chaos, doubt, procrastination, Resistance, and more).
Confession: I’m impatient as fuck.
When I finally decide that I want something, I want it NOW. I don’t want to wait for it. My creative juices go into overdrive trying to figure out how to get it NOW.
Maybe you can relate?
It’s the problem with being a multi-passionate writer who has big dreams to fulfill. Because there’s so much you want to do and achieve and be and have, and you think you need to have it all right now.
And so if it doesn’t show up right away, you think you’re doing something wrong. You worry that it will never happen for you. You tell yourself that maybe you’re not good enough or worthy enough to have it. Or, even worse, that it happens for everyone else, but it won’t happen for you.
Been there. Done that. Still do it at times. But the thing I’ve learned over my decade of being a writer online is this: it never happens as fast as you think it’s going to.
And this is a good thing.
Huh? How can not getting what you want when you want it be a good thing?
Because if you got everything right now, all at once, right when you wanted it, chaos would ensue. A kind of chaos you’ve not yet experienced.
Imagine waking up and having everything you’ve been asking for right there waiting for you. The body. The success. The money. Sounds like a dream, right? Maybe. Until the calls start. And the emails.
Oh, you don’t know about the calls?
What about the emails? Didn’t hear about those either?
OK, let’s back up for a second.
Imagine that you’re Nicholas Sparks. You’re one of the richest writers in the world. You’ve seen more success in the last two decades than most see in two lifetimes. You’re always in demand. You get probably 100 calls a day and 1,000+ emails. Now imagine you woke up tomorrow and that was all true for you.
Except for you, it all happened overnight.
When you went to bed last night, you were still you, a struggling author just trying to get your shit together and sell some books. When you woke up, you are the most in-demand author this planet has ever seen. Everyone wants a piece of you. Everyone wants to work with you, hire you, pay you, call you, get your feedback, ask for your approval, have you represent their charity…
And since it happened overnight, you don’t have the support team or systems in place to handle the chaos, so you’re laying on your bed with thousands of unanswered emails and hundreds of unreturned phone calls… and all you can think is, “I wanted this? REALLY??”
If this happened, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. You wouldn’t be ready for it. You’d bust SO FAR past your Upper Limit that your subconscious would immediately find ways to sabotage everything so you can get back to a place where you feel safe and comfortable again.
This is why the pace at which things actually show up in your life is a blessing.
The pace is there to help you up-level gradually. So your mind and your capacity to hold on to the success is where it needs to be when the success shows up.
That way you don’t sabotage it or wreck it with negative thoughts and old beliefs that you still have. Because you’ll have worked through that shit already and you’ll be to a place where you feel like you can handle the success you’re asking for.
You may not feel ready, but you feel capable.
And that’s why you have to do your part—show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent—as well as trust in the timing of the Universe. It’s impossible for you to do those three things: show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent, and not get where you want to go.
So if you know for certain that you’ll get there and your dream life will be your real life, why worry about the timing? Why stress yourself out trying to make things happen faster?
Just enjoy life, do you, and trust that as long as you keep going, the pieces of your dream life will continue to show up, until one day in the not too far off future, you’ll be living the dream life in your reality that you’ve only seen in your mind up ’till now.
Write with a purpose, live with intention,