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I Sometimes Wonder Why More People Don’t Finally Choose To Wake The Fuck Up And Live

As I write this I’m sitting at a table in the corner of the Starbucks down the street from the place I’m staying right now. To the left of me are two people–a guy and a girl–sitting with their Teavana drinks and talking about work stuff.

They clearly work in an office and are likely on a team of some kind together. The guy is talking animatedly, making his pitch for why they need to move in this specific direction with their project.

The woman seems to be there. She’s looking the guy in the eyes as he talks, she’s nodding at everything he says and she’s even throwing in a, “uh-huh” and “yep” every now and again. All signs point to she’s paying attention.

Except her posture and the emotion on her face. Her posture says this is the last place I want to be right now. And her face says my eyes are looking at you, but I’m really imagining myself thousands of miles away, swimming in the tropical waters of the next vacation I plan on taking when I have enough vacation time built up.

So essentially her body is present, but her mind is elsewhere.

And the sad thing is, this is life for many people. They’re constantly going through the motions but their minds are never present, because they’re always day-dreaming.

Dreaming about that thing they really want to be doing. That creative thing. The one that calls to them from somewhere deep inside. The one they keep pushing away by numbly going through the motions in their daily lives and telling themselves that it just is what it is.

Most people don’t believe they’re meant for greatness. And many that do still don’t believe it’s actually possible for them to achieve it.

So they settle. They call the reality they see around them currently their life and they plant roots by buying a house they don’t really want (’cause what they really want is to be off traveling the world), working a job that makes their soul feel dead (’cause doing anything but your soulwork will always make you feel that way), and numbing out with food and TV and alcohol and whatever else they do instead of doing the thing they really want to be doing. They just give up on their lives being any better, so they go through the motions that they’re told they should be going through each day–get up, go to work, come home, cook dinner, clean up your house, watch TV, go to bed, do it all over again–and wait to die.

Now we’re obviously all dying, and since we’re not vampires in Twilight, we all get closer to it every day. But it’s what we do with the days inbetween the day we’re born and the day we die that actually matter.

And sadly, most people are not really living.

Most people are on autopilot, going through the motions, ignoring the stuff they feel inside them and numbing out. Because they think this is just how it is. Because they’ve been told that this just how it is.

Because they choose to believe that this is just how it is.

But you don’t have to fall for that bullshit. You can choose, right now, to wake up and LIVE.

You can choose to never live another day on autopilot. You can choose to never again have a conversation with someone where you’re nodding and pretending to listen to what they’re saying when you’re really daydreaming about the life you really want to live.

You can choose to go let go of a life of complaining about how bad things are and how much things suck for you, and step into a life of gratitude and freedom.

A life that you love. A life that feels like a dream. A life where you get to wake up every day, do the things you love doing and get paid to be you.

You can create a life where you have it all (however you define “it all”) and all on your terms.

That was a belief I took on as a young child… that I could live a life that where I have it all and on my terms. And that belief is what has allowed me to create the life I’m living right now.

A life where I get to choose. How I spend my time. What I do all day. The projects I work on and who I work on them with. How I work, when I work and where I work.

I no longer feel like a victim in my life. Because I’m choosing everything now, intentionally, instead of living on default, like I used to when I was still working my soul-sucking corporate job.

Back then I was just like this woman sitting to the left of me, doing stuff I didn’t really care about, spending 8+ hours a day adding value to someone else’s business while the dreams I had were slowly dying inside me, complaining all day (and night) because life is so unfair and that was not how I wanted to be living.

Until I finally decided to take back control.

There’s a misconception that just because you have a dream means you’ll eventually live it. Not true.

I had a dream and felt on every level of my being that it was meant for me, but that didn’t mean I was gonna live it. And the same goes for you.

You may have big dreams inside you (and I know you do ’cause you wouldn’t be here right now if you didn’t), but that doesn’t mean you’ll ever get to live them.

Not if you continue to live a life of default where you just look at the reality around you and call it “your life” and then spend your days reacting, by default, to the things that happen to and around you. Default living will never get you to your dream life.

Your dream life is absolutely and totally out there and available to you and possible for you. But it’s not just gonna magically show up one day.

You have to go out there and create it. You have to take action, daily, with intention and purpose.

You have to decide that you’re no longer gonna hit the “snooze” button on your life. You have to decide that you’re gonna wake the fuck up and LIVE. Right now.

You have to decide that your dreams and the stuff you hear and feel inside you is what you’re meant to be doing and spending your time on. No matter how unrealistic or illogical that stuff may seem.

It wasn’t realistic OR logical for me to quit my $70k+ a year corporate social media strategist job five years ago to pursue a calling I felt in my heart to be a full-time writer, entrepreneur and creator. It was actually a pretty stupid decision in most people’s minds.

Why would you ever leave a job that paid so much to go and do god only knows what and have no idea where your money will come from? That was the question on most minds when I told people what I was doing.

Without a plan. Without a savings account. Without knowing what would happen next. I just jumped and believed it would work out.

I just decided to WAKE UP AND LIVE.

Now your version of waking up and living may look totally different than mine. For you, waking up and living might mean finally calling yourself a writer and allowing yourself to put words on the page or hit “publish” on that book you’ve been revising for years. Or it may be something else completely.

The point isn’t what you do when you finally decide to wake up and live, it’s that you finally decide to wake up and live and then actually go and do it.

I get to live my dream life every single day now, because of the decision I made 5+ years ago that I was no longer gonna settle for anything less than my dream life.

It hasn’t been an easy road, I’ve had a lot of setbacks and struggle moments and times when I thought I made the biggest mistake of my life and should just go back. But I didn’t. I stuck with it and I stayed the course.

And I still am.

Because living your dream life is not a destination. You’re not ever gonna get to a point where you’re done and you can just hang up your hat and retire. Living your dream life is a constantly evolving and up-leveling and shifting journey.

A journey that starts with a decision to finally wake up and live.

Dream life or bust,

 

 

 

#DreamLifeOrBust #DailyThinkDifferent

P.S. The doors to the Bestselling Author Mastermind are CLOSING soon!! And they may not open again ’til 2018. Which means if you want to be part of the BEST group online for writers and authors who want to create their dream writing lives all on their terms, now’s the time to get in.

>> Join us here: www.jenniferblanchard.net/landing/mastermind

You’re Either All In Or You’re Out… Which One Are You?

I’ll give it six months and if I don’t find an agent by then, I’ll just become a self-published author.”
 
It’s been four months and nothing is happening. I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this.”
 
If it doesn’t happen in the next two years, I’m gonna go do this other thing instead.”
 
If I could put a label on those three statements and statements like them, here’s what I’d use: NEVER GOING TO ACHIEVE SUCCESS.
 
When you want something, when you have a dream that you want to bring to life, when you have a desire you want to manifest, the last thing you should ever be doing is putting a timeframe around it or setting up arbitrary “rules” for when it’s time to throw in the towel. Because doing that will stop you from achieving what you want.
 
Why?
 
You’re not all in. You’re not willing to do whatever it takes, for as long as it takes, until it takes, and then keep going.
 
That’s the thing about success, those who achieve it only do so because they’ve thrown out the back up plan, they’ve gone all in on the goal, and they’re not willing to accept anything except making it happen.
 
Success really comes down to who’s most committed, most consistent and most willing to do whatever it takes and be in it for the long-haul. There can be no fairweather goal-chasing in the level of success that you dream of playing at.
 
You either want it, or you don’t.
 
You’re either committed, or you’re not.
 
You either give up the back up plan and go all in for however long it takes, or you may as well give up now and just go with the back up plan. ‘Cause so long as that back up plan exists, you will never do what it’s gonna take to achieve your dream.
 
When you have another option in mind, it stops you from pushing through the Resistance or the doubt or fear or the “I don’t feel like its.” It stops you from laser-focusing on what you really want and blocking out everything else. Because you have a backup plan.
 
When you’re all in on your dream, and when you’re willing to do whatever it takes, there’s no need for a backup plan. Because you already know there’s no other option for you. You’ll either get there or you’ll die trying.
 

Backup plans are for people who don’t believe in themselves enough to fight for what they really want.

 
But when you believe in yourself and in the work you’re doing and in your dreams, backup plans become unnecessary. People who fully believe in themselves and in what they’re doing will always find a way to make it happen.
 
And the best part is, you never have to do it alone. The Universe is totally here and ready to help you make whatever dream you have happen. This universal energy and power is available to all of us. But it only works if you use it and only if you’re laser-focused on achieving your goal.
 
Otherwise you’ll keep doing the one-foot-in-one-foot-out dance, and the Universe will have no idea what you really want. Because doubting and changing course a million times and not being clear on what you want just confuses things.
 
Don’t get me wrong–it’s totally fine to change your mind and to pivot directions or quit what you’re doing and go do something else. It’s not about never changing your mind or pivoting. That stuff has to happen, it’s what gives you clarity on what you really want.
 
But you have to eventually commit to and go all in on something and then stick with it until you’ve achieved it.
 
And the good news is, when you’re laser-focused on the goal and you know what you want, you can absolutely have it and achieve it, and the Universe will totally show up for you and help you make it happen.
 
You just gotta give up the backup plan. You’ve gotta stop putting parameters around your dreams or the success you desire to achieve and go ALL IN. All in means no back up plan, not going to be detered, eyes on the prize, willing to risk it all, and never, ever giving up no matter how grim it may look.
 
Are you ALL IN on your writing dreams? Or do you have a backup plan for fear that you can’t really achieve what you want?
 
Here’s the truth: if a dream is inside you and if you feel called to achieve something, it’s because you’re meant to. It came to you because you have everything it takes to make it happen.
 
But you gotta get your head out of the sand, take a good look at where you are currently, and then go all in on closing the gap between where you are now and where you want to be.
 
No rules. No timeframes. No backup plans.
 
Dream life or bust,
 
 

#DreamLifeOrBust #DailyThinkDifferent

 
P.S. Are you ready to go ALL IN on your dream to be a full-time novelist? Today is the FINAL DAY to grab my Mid-Year Motivator writing bundle and get access to four of my best resources EVER for under $100!! The sale ends TONIGHT at 11:59 p.m. EDT.
 
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This Is Why Nothing Ever Changes

Have you ever had a bad experience at a restaurant? The food was cold, the waiter was rude and they tried to charge you for something you ordered but didn’t actually get. You walked out that day and said you’d never ever go there again.
 
But then a few weeks later, your friend suggests you go to that restuarant for lunch. You don’t want to go because of your previous experience, so you tell your friend all about it and share just how bad it was. Your friend says, “everyone has a bad day” and insists on going there anyhow.
 
So you go, grumbling along as you do, pointing out all the stuff they’re doing wrong. And your experience the second time around doesn’t go much better than the first time–the waiter spills something on you, they ran out of the menu item you wanted and the music was too loud.
 
But what if the reason it was a similar experience is because you assumed that it would be and you expected it to be?
 
What if you projected your first experience on your second, so that, again, you would walk out disappointed? Because you would also walk out feeling “right” and being able to say, “I told you so.”
 
But what if your assumptions and expectation that it would be bad again is what actually made it bad again?
 
‘Cause that’s the thing about the human mind… once it has an experience, it continues to pull up that experience and reference it anytime a similar experience happens or you’re in a similar–or the same–place or situation. And so it’s actually your assumptions and expectations based on previous experiences that keep you repeating that same experience again.
 
Which then leads you to believe that it just “is what it is.”
 
So if you’re not achieving the goals you have or you’re still not writing or finishing the novel (or other creative project) that you started–assumption and expectation is probably what’s keeping you stuck. Because if you assume you won’t finish or you expect that you’ll keep on repeating the same behavior patterns–procrastination, doubt, self-sabotage–then that’s exactly what will happen.
 
In life, you don’t get what you want, you get what you expect.
 
Here’s another example to truly drive this point home about how much expectation and assumption can get in the way of you creating the success you want and living the life you dream of…
 
A few months ago, my cousin announced on her Facebook page that she’s taking her mom to Hawaii for her 60th birthday–in two years. My cousin likes to plan things out way ahead of time; it makes it feel more doable for her that way. And then she invited whoever wanted to join them to leave a comment so she could get a head count.
 
And one of her friends commented and said, “I’d love to join you!! But we can’t afford it.” Now keep in mind this trip is TWO YEARS AWAY (in 2019). Yet this woman already assumes and expects that the way things are for her financially right now is how they’ll also be two years from now.
 
And for her, they will be, because she’s already projecting into her future that assumption and expectation. So of course that’s what will show up for her–because you don’t get what you want, you get what you EXPECT.
 
Assumptions and expectations are what keep people stuck, spinning their wheels and living mediocre lives they don’t love, because they expect and assume that things will always be the same and won’t ever change. Expectations and assumptions are the reason people spend months, years and even a lifetime repeating the same behavior patterns and continuing to create the same results–usually ones they don’t want–over and over again.
 
It’s sad, really, because life can change practically overnight when you change your thinking and change what you expect and assume. How?
 
Instead of saying, “I can’t afford it” to something that’s two years away, open a savings account and commit to putting 5-10% of your income into it every month. Two years from now you’ll not only be able to afford the trip, but that leap of faith, acting-as-if action will help make the trip a done deal.
 
The truth is, expectations and assumptions are just a MINDSET–a way of thinking that can keep you stuck and playing small. So if you change what you expect and assume–you can change your whole life.
 
Yes, it does take having faith in the Universe and trusting in uncertainty. But just like anything else, the more you do it, the better you get at it.
 
So instead of continuing to expect that you’ll never finish your novel or you’ll never find an agent or you’ll never get reviews on Amazon or no one will want to buy your book or read it anyhow, expect something different.
 
Assume you will finish, you will get reviews, you will sign with an agent, you will find a readership for your books and sell lots of copies. It may not happen right away, but if you keep focusing on the new expectations and assumptions–and keep taking action–it will eventually happen.
 
Because what you expect and assume will be your reality. You call it in with how you’re choosing to think. And yes, it’s always a choice.
 
Your thoughts, beliefs, assumptions and expectations are what’s really creating your life and the things you experience every day.
 
So when you assume and expect what you want to show up, guess what? It eventually will. As long as you don’t sabotage it by returning to old patterns and expectations about, “that’s just how it is.” Because if “that’s just how it is” then that’s just how it will always be.
 
Change your expectations, change your life.
 
Dream life or bust,
 
 

#DailyThinkDifferent #DreamLifeOrBust

 
P.S. For the next 72 HOURS ONLY you can grab the Mid-Year Motivator writing bundle and get access to some of the best resources I’ve ever created, including the Write Your Damn Novel eCourse which is worth the entire price of the bundle (and you still get MORE!!).
 

How Much Longer Are You Going to Wait for This?

I keep thinking about purpose and what I really want to be saying with my writing that I haven’t allowed myself to fully say before. And what I want to say, is this… (brace yourself):
 
It’s time to wake the fuck up. It’s time to STOP conforming and living other peoples’ standards and rules. It’s time to STOP worrying about what people think and just go after your dreams.
 
It’s time to stop working BS jobs and walking on eggshells and only partially being who you are. You deserve better and your gifts and purpose deserves to be let out.
 
Why do you think you were born with these talents and gifts? Because you’re meant to use them. You’re meant to create a life around them.
 
You weren’t born to live someone else’s idea of what life is “supposed to” be about. Fuck that shit!
 
You’re born to do what you love and live the life of your dreams.
 
You weren’t born to conform or live on someone else’s terms. And yes, I know you like predictability and certainty, but what the fuck is certain about what you’re doing right now?
 
Working a job you don’t love and don’t really care about–even if you happen to be good at it. If they decide tomorrow that they no longer need you, you’re out on your ass. Then what? Find another BS job where you’ll sit there all day and think about what you REALLY want to be doing?
 
That creative thing you’ve always been good at. Maybe even something you’d consider to be a god-given talent. That writing. Singing. Dancing. Building. Painting. Drawing. Or maybe even all of the above, as you’re multi-passionate and good at quite a few things.
 
And yet there you sit. Wasting away doing stuff you don’t love to please people who never lived their dream and just spent their lives people-pleasing.
 
Imagine instead being able to control your day and what you spent it doing. What if you got to wake up every morning and do something you love and that you actually care about? Imagine what that life would look like. Really think about it for a second.
 
And now admit it–you’re already thinking about this all day long while you’re doing the thing you do that gives you predictable income and a mediocre life that makes you feel dead inside.
 
Sure, there are parts that make you feel happy–your family and friends, and the stuff you do for fun on the weekends and when you’re granted permission to take vacation days.
 
But inside you’re dying–a little more every day. And that feeling shows up in your life in ways you’re not even yet conscious of. You probably call it anxiety or stress or heartburn or insomnia or being overweight.
 
But the truth is, the reason that stuff has manifested in your life is because you’re not letting out what’s really inside–the dreams and desires and talents and the way you really feel and what you really think.
 
You’re walking on eggshells and people-pleasing and living someone else’s life or the life someone else told you that you should live.
 
Ignoring your dreams. Pushing away your desires. Stuffing them down with junk food and TV and over-the-counter remedies that help you feel numb to what’s inside.
 
Because if you can’t feel it, then it’s not really there, right? And yet day after day, there it is. Nagging you and begging you to make a different choice.
 
A choice to STOP caring what other people think and instead ask yourself what YOU really think and then having the courage to go live it.
 
Do you really want to wake up every day and allow you life to be controlled and dictated by someone else? Do you really want to keep telling yourself you’ll go after your dreams “one day” while continuing to spend 8+ hours a day 5+ days a week doing something you could give a fuck less about?
 
Or do you want to live the life you’ve always dreamed about? The one you know you really want and could actually have if you were brave enough to let go of the bullshit that’s keeping you on the hamster wheel of “one day.”
 
One day I’ll live my dream. One day I’ll do that creative thing I’m so damn good at. One day I’ll stop being afraid and realize that the only certainty in life comes from being exactly who you are and doing what you love and sharing the talents and gifts that you were born with.
 
But what if “one day” never comes?
 
Are you OK leaving this world knowing you didn’t do what you came here to do? Do you think you’ll lay on your death bed and be so grateful that you lived the life your family or society told you that you should live, instead of living on your terms and doing what you love to do?
 
It’s cool if you would be, I guess. But you know what I think? I think that scares the fuck out of you. I think you’re scared of having regrets and wishing you’d stopped caring what people think and lived your dreams.
 
And yet there you sit, doing nothing about it. Messing around here and there doing that thing you love, but never making it the priority and habit that it deserves to be. Dreaming, but rarely doing.
 
And the days and weeks and months and years roll on and you just keep telling yourself “one day.” One day. One day. ONE DAY.
 
And on you go.
 
But what if you decided right now that TODAY was that one day? What if you started to do those things you love and those things you were born to do, every single day? What then?
 
I’ll tell you what then.
 
Then you’d be living the life you dream of. Then you’d get braver and more confident in doing what you love. Then you’d feel FREE inside and you’d no longer need to numb yourself.
 
Then you’d be sharing your gifts and talents with the world. Then you’d be living a life of purpose and intention. Then you’d be being exactly who you are and who you want to be and doing what you love and saying what you think and not caring about what anyone else thinks or wants for your life except you.
 
Then you’d be happy and fulfilled. And then you’d be on your death bed feeling grateful for and looking back on the day you finally decided TODAY was one day and that you didn’t have to know the full picture or even the next step in order to just START.
 
You can make that decision right now, TODAY. To think for yourself. To do what you love. To not care about anyone elses’ opinion. And the rest, as they say, will be history.
 
Dream life or bust,
 
 
#DreamLifeOrBust #DailyThinkDifferent
 

P.S. If you’re ready to do what you love and create a daily habit around it, be sure to check out the recording of my Writing Life Rehab workshop. It’s available until 11:59 p.m. EDT tonight for the same price as the live workshop (price doubles at midnight!!).

 

See It In Your Mind, Feel It In Your Being and The Universe Will Deliver It to You

About six months ago I found out that I’m moving to Austin this summer. My husband is in a band and they all decided that it was time to get serious about being full-time musicians and that we needed to live somewhere much more condusive to that goal.

I immediately got on board and decided that I’d be totally cool with moving if I could have everything I want… an apartment with upgraded features, like hardwood floors and granite counter tops; cool amenities like a pool, a gym and a place where I could go write every day; living close to water; having a city view; and being walking distance to cool stuff, like coffee shops, restaurants and bars.

A pretty tall order. But I was set on it. So I started to visualize myself living that exact experience.

Every day for the last six months I’d write all about what I wanted in my journal. And then during my visualization practice I’d imagine me and my husband and dog living that life. I’d see myself getting up in the morning, taking the dog for a walk around the lake, then going home to do my mindset practice before packing up my laptop to head to the apartment common area so I could work on my daily blog post, fiction writing and all the other things I work on every day. I’d see myself finishing my morning work and then going to the gym or swimming laps in the pool, before heading back to my apartment for a shower and lunch.

I’d imagine this scenario over and over again every day. Some days I’d actually walk myeslf through that exact routine in my mind as I visualized. Other days I’d just spend time feeling the emotions of having everything I want right now.

I did this daily for six months straight.

Then this week, my husband and I took our dog on a road trip to Austin to check things out and do some apartment hunting. Before we left we researched a bunch of places we wanted to see and that we thought looked like a good place to live.

Then the other day we drove to all of the apartments we found online to take a look, including one that we had an appointment scheduled at. Everything we saw was OK, but it wasn’t quite what we really wanted.

And then something magical happened…

We were driving out of the apartment complex we just finished visiting, got turned around somehow in the parking lot and ended up going out the wrong exit. And that exit led to a street we’d hadn’t been on yet. While we tried to figure out where we were, we both noticed an apartment complex we hadn’t seen online.

Something about it just looked right. You could feel the positive vibes just by looking at it. So we pulled into the parking lot and went into the leasing office to ask some questions and check things out.

And not only did this apartment complex have all of the features and amenities I wanted (including in-apartment laundry!!), but it was also a 10-minute walk from the lake and a 10-minute drive into downtown.

Not only that, but you can see a view of the city from the parking lot. AND there’s a Starbucks within walking distance where I can go work every day if I want to.

It felt totally meant to be, especially with the Starbucks being so close, because I’ve always had a secret desire to be able to work at a coffee shop every day.

And that’s when I realized the Universe had delivered everything I’d been visualizing for the past six months. And the crazy part is, I wasn’t even visualizing the Starbucks and yet the Universe still delivered it to me!!

THIS is what it means to create something in your mind, to see it, to visualize it, to feel it like it’s already real (even when it’s not yet) and then to have it manifest in your life.

Your mind is the most powerful tool you have at your disposal to create your life exactly how you want it to be. But you have to use it and you have to be consistent with it and you have to keep on going, even if you’re not seeing the results of it yet.

I spent six months visualizing the life I wanted to create for us in Austin. And now that life is starting to come into reality. I’m more excited about this move than I’ve been about any move I’ve made so far in my life (and I’ve made many–I’ve lived in several places in NY, SoCal and Houston).

The best part is, I totally created it with my mind. That’s where it started. Now it’s actually showing up in my real life. Now I’m able to see it and touch it and hold it in my hands.

And do you want to know something pretty awesome? You can do this same creation process with ANYTHING that you want to create in your life. ANYTHING!!!!

It may not happen overnight and it may take time for it to actually show up in your reality, but if you stick with it and keep going, it will happen.

So, what do you really want right now? Get clear on it, then spend 3-5 minutes a day visualizing it and feeling it as already done, and not long from now it will be.

Write with a purpose, live with intention,

 

 

 

#DailyThinkDifferent #DreamLifeOrBust

P.S. It’s the FINAL DAY to join us for the Writing Life Rehab masterclass happening tomorrow Saturday April 22 at 2 p.m. EST!! If you’re ready to drop the excuses and stop putting your writing off so you can finally step into being the writer and author you’ve always wanted to be, you do not want to miss this workshop.

And even if you can’t attend live, sign up anyhow! I’ll be sending out a replay of the workshop after it’s done.

>> Details and sign up here

You Can Create Anything You Want When You Believe You Can (And With This Process…)

A few years ago I decided that I wanted to get front-row parking spots. Now I have no problem parking in the back and walking. Sometimes I park far back, especially on nice days, just to get some more exercise.
 
But I also thought it would be fun to have the option–to know that a front-row spot was available, even if I didn’t want it.
 
So I decided to create a belief that I always get front-row parking spots. Because that’s all it takes to see what you want show up in your reality; you have to believe it.
 
Here’s the breakdown of how I created the belief that I always get front-row parking spots, which is not just a belief I now have, but it has also come true in my life.
 
Anytime I go to the store or out to dinner or whatever, I always get a close spot. Sometimes I don’t take it or I don’t feel like waiting a minute for the person who’s pulling out, so I just park wherever and walk.
 
But the point is, I now have the option. And that came from creating the belief that I always get front-row parking spots.
 
And the cool part is, this process works with ANYTHING that you want, whether it’s front-row parking or a six-figure book deal (I haven’t tried it for that yet, but maybe I will soon!!).
 

1. Decide What You Want

 
The first step to creating anything is knowing what it is that you want. You have to get really clear on it, otherwise you won’t be able to create it exactly as you want it.
 
Grab your journal or notebook and freestyle-write in it for 10-15 minutes, getting really clear on what you want. Dig deep here and write it all out.
 
After you’ve finished, choose one thing that you’re going to start with. Yes, you can install multiple beliefs all at once if you want to, but that can take more time because you’re spreading your focus out.
 
If you choose one new belief to focus on at a time, you can program it into yourself faster and make it show up in your reality faster too.
 
Once you know what the one new belief is that you want to create, write a very specific, concise sentence that feels good to you and that declares the new belief you’re now choosing to create.
 
For example, “I always get front-row parking.” Simple, to the point and powerfully declares what I want.
 
Action Step #1: Get clear on one new belief you’d like to create for yourself. Write a specific, concise belief statement that feels good to you and powerfully declares what you want.
 

2. Tell Yourself How You Want It to Be

 
The next thing I did was started telling myself that I always get front-row spots. When I’d be driving to the store or going out to eat, even on days when I knew it would busy, I’d just tell myself that I always get front-row parking spots.
 
Sometimes I’d get to the store or restaurant and there wouldn’t be any front-row spots. But I’d ignore that, park my car wherever and keep telling myself that I always get front-row parking spots.
 
And sometimes I’d get there and there would be a front-row spot open and waiting for me, or someone would be just about to pull out and if I waited a couple minutes I could have their spot right up front.
 
The most important thing is that you don’t ever look around and say, “it’s not working.” Even when it isn’t working.
 
If I didn’t get a front-row spot, I didn’t say that it wasn’t working, because I knew I was working on it, and that soon it would be working. So I just chose to believe that it was working, even when my physical reality said it wasn’t.
 
Action Step #2: When you’re out and about living your life, tell yourself the new belief over and over again. Say it out loud, say it in your head, write it down every morning in your journaling, repeat it as much and as often as you can (this is why I recommend doing one new belief at a time, because more than that can get overwhelming to keep track of).
 

3. Bring On the Gratitude

 
Whenever I’d get to the store or restaurant and actually got a front-row spot, I’d always say, “thank you Universe!” as I was parking. This is key, because being grateful for what you have brings you more.
 
So anytime your new belief actually works and you see evidence of it in your reality, be sure to acknowledge it and say “thank you Universe.” Acknowledging it means you’re paying attention and putting your focus on it. And whatever you focus on expands.
 
Action Step #3: Say “thank you” in the moment, when your new belief or evidence of your new belief actually shows up in your reality. And also be grateful in general, for all the good things going on in your life. Gratitude is a powerful tool for changing your life.
 

4. See It As Normal

 
Eventually I could feel the belief that I always get front-row parking starting to become the norm for me, meaning I’d go to the store or restaurant and more times than not, there’d be a front-row parking spot. That means I’ve normalized getting front-row parking.
 
And what’s normal for you is what will always show up. Expectation is a huge part of the manifesting process. So once you’ve seen enough evidence of your new belief happening in your real life, it’s time to start accepting that belief is normal for you.
 
Now when I get a front-row spot, I say, “of course! Thank you! More please!” This is a combination of gratitude and expectation.
 
By saying “of course” I’m acknowleding that this is normal for me. Saying “thank you” is bringing gratitude for what I have into the mix, and “more please” is telling the Universe that I want more of that exact thing.
 
“Of course! Thank you! More please!” is how you’ll make your new belief normal for you. (Shout out to my amazing friend and client, Maru Iabichela, who taught this statement to me!)
 
Action Step #4: As you continue to experience your new belief or see evidence of it show up in your life, start to mix into your gratitude statements phrases that acknowledge this new belief is now normal for you. Of course! Thank you! More please!
 

5. Keep Going

 
At this point I’d say the belief that I always get front-row parking is pretty engrained in me. But I still continue to reaffirm it every time I’m parking my car.
 
Because it never hurts to remind yourself how good you have it, and it just continues to program that belief into your subconscious mind.
 
Repetition is everything.
 
Action Step #5: Continue to collect evidence of your new belief and reaffirm it as much as possible.
 
Once you feel like your new belief is programmed enough that it’s now real, you can go through this same process with another new belief that you want to create.
 
Again, you can definitely work on multiple beliefs at one time. I do this every day in my journaling and mindset work when I write out my reality and how I want things to be in every area of my life and business. But I also have a few beliefs I’m actively focused on programming into myself.
 
Because a belief is just a thought you keep thinking. And if you can change the way you’re thinking, then you can change what you believe.
 
Aligning your beliefs with the life and success you dream of having is what’s going to bring it to reality for you.
 
Write with a purpose, live with intention,
 
 
#DailyThinkDifferent #DreamLifeOrBust
 
P.S. The doors to the Bestselling Author Mastermind are CLOSING Sunday April 16 at 11:59 p.m. EST!! If you want an inspiring, motivating, empowering, supportive environment to become the novelist and author you dream of being, there’s no better place for you. AND as a member, you get FREE access to all of my workshops and digital products that cost $100 or less (and 50% off the ones that cost more than $100).
 
 

Just Feel Good and the Rest Will Take Care of Itself

A life coach that I follow online once posted something on Facebook where she talked about the kinds of music people listen to. She said if your life is awesome and you’re happy, you most likely listen to upbeat, festival-type music that’s peppy and has positive lyrics. But if you’re listening to country music, for example, or music with not so happy lyrics, that could actually be why your life isn’t working as well as it could.

And I get what she was saying with this—that you attract things to your life based on how you think and speak. I agree with that and whole-heartedly believe it and live it.

What I disagreed with is the idea that just because a song has negative lyrics that means listening to it or singing along with it would cause your life to be negative too.

I listen to rock music (mostly from the grunge era), and if you know anything about rock music, the lyrics aren’t exactly peppy. Usually the lyrics are angry or expressing a negative emotion or experience.

But that doesn’t mean my life is negative. The exact opposite, in fact. My life is always better when I’m listening to the music that makes my soul happy.

Grunge rock does that for me. It brings me back to a simpler time in life when I was growing up and falling in love with music for the first time (as I’ve fallen in love with music many times over the years).

That always evokes a happy feeling in me. And singing the words out loud—even negative words—helps me amp that happy feeling up even more.

It has often been said that words have power. And they absolutely do. But where the power really comes from isn’t just from the words being used.

It’s the feeling behind the words. The feeling is what makes the words powerful.

When you say, “I hate you” there’s a feeling behind those words. When you say, “I’m not good enough,” there’s a feeling behind those words. And the feeling that’s behind the words is what really matters.

Because you can say the words, “I’m happy,” but if you’re not actually feeling happy inside, the words don’t have the same power as when you say, “I’m happy,” and actually are. 

The whole thing with law of attraction and manifesting the things you want in your life, is that words matter. But they don’t matter as much as feelings.

Feelings are actually the biggest deciding factor in what manifests. Because feelings create energy—either positive or negative. And energy is what attracts things.

Which means the lyrics of the music you listen to—or the words you speak—only matter if they’re creating a bad feeling in you.

Example… when you’re young and you get your heart broken for the first time, you listen to all those sappy love songs that make you think about the one who got away. That is when music and lyrics are causing negative energy and negative things to manifest. Because your focus is on lack and being not enough and feeling bad.

But if you have a playlist that you love to sing to and that brings a feeling of joy to you, for example, then no matter what the lyrics say, you will feel good. And the feeling good creates good energy that attracts positive things.

This distinction is MASSIVELY important. It could just change your whole life. 

For a long time I worried about the words I was singing out loud as I sang along to my favorite songs. Or the words I’d say by default because of my subconscious programming. But now I know better.

It’s the feelings that matter, not the words. 

And yeah, it’s true that some words just come with certain feelings. So if you’re saying “I’m not good enough” or “I can’t do that,” it’s very likely that’s what you’ll experience in your reality and attract to your life (more situations where you feel that way).

But when you’re feeling amazing inside, you can say the words, “I’m not good enough” and they won’t even penetrate you, because you’ll feel so deeply in the moment that they’re not true. 

This same thing applies to thoughts.

Law of attraction says that whatever you think about you will attract to your life. And again, I don’t disagree with this. But there’s a distinction to be made, because it’s not about the specific thoughts.

It’s about the feelings that the thoughts create.

And yes, certain thoughts will come with certain feelings, good and bad. But you have the power. Power that extends far past the words you’re hearing in your head.

You have the power to create whatever feelings you want to feel. All day every day.

Now that’s not to say you won’t have life chaos happen that tries to change how you’re feeling, you will. But if you don’t let it get to you, and you keep that happy, positive feeling inside, then no matter what happens it won’t penetrate you.

I create the happy, positive, empowering feelings that I want to feel every single day by doing my daily mindset practice, which includes freestyle journaling to get the crap out of my head, then writing affirmations declaring who I am and that my dream life is already real, and then I finish up with 5-7 minutes of visualization where I walk myself through my ideal day, weaving in as much of my dream stuff as I can (like the car I want to drive, where I want to live, the kind of activities I do, etc).

Those feelings then carry themselves into my day. And so long as I don’t allow anything else to change those feelings (yes, it IS a choice to allow something to affect you), they stay with me all day long.

This took some time to build up to. In the beginning I’d feel the good feelings for a little while and then life chaos or worry would take over and I’d be back to feeling bad. But I just kept working on it.

At one point, I was doing 2+ hours of mindset work a day. Sometimes I still do. And every minute has been worth it.

My daily mindset practice has helped me to focus my mind and get my emotions in check, so I can go through my day feeling great and manifesting great things as a result of feeling that way. 

And when I’m feeling like that, no negative lyric (or thought) in the world can change it 🙂

Write with a purpose, live with intention,

 

 

#DailyThinkDifferent #DreamLifeOrBust

P.S. It’s the FINAL DAYS to join my upcoming workshop—FINISH Your Damn Novel: 30-days of kick-ass motivation, inspiration, accountability and getting-writing-done for writers who’ve started a novel (draft or revision) and want to FINISH. We start April 1 (that’s Saturday!!).

And… I’ve added a new EXTENDED PAYMENT PLAN! Because I want to make it super easy for you to say HELL YES and join us! 

This workshop is perfect for you if you’re sick of never finishing or sick of taking so long to finish and you just want to get your damn novel (draft or revision) FINISHED so you can finally move on to the next step in the process.

I’ll be revising my novel along with you over the 30 days, as well as sending you daily motivational emails, doing livestreams throughout each week in the private workshop Facebook group to keep you moving along and overcoming all the stuff that tries to get in the way of you finishing (stuff like, life chaos, doubt, procrastination, Resistance, and more).

>> Details and sign up here 

Accept the Speed and Keep Going…

Confession: I’m impatient as fuck.

When I finally decide that I want something, I want it NOW. I don’t want to wait for it. My creative juices go into overdrive trying to figure out how to get it NOW.

Maybe you can relate?

It’s the problem with being a multi-passionate writer who has big dreams to fulfill. Because there’s so much you want to do and achieve and be and have, and you think you need to have it all right now.

And so if it doesn’t show up right away, you think you’re doing something wrong. You worry that it will never happen for you. You tell yourself that maybe you’re not good enough or worthy enough to have it. Or, even worse, that it happens for everyone else, but it won’t happen for you.

Been there. Done that. Still do it at times. But the thing I’ve learned over my decade of being a writer online is this: it never happens as fast as you think it’s going to. 

And this is a good thing.

Huh? How can not getting what you want when you want it be a good thing?

Because if you got everything right now, all at once, right when you wanted it, chaos would ensue. A kind of chaos you’ve not yet experienced. 

Imagine waking up and having everything you’ve been asking for right there waiting for you. The body. The success. The money. Sounds like a dream, right? Maybe. Until the calls start. And the emails.

Oh, you don’t know about the calls?

What about the emails? Didn’t hear about those either?

OK, let’s back up for a second.

Imagine that you’re Nicholas Sparks. You’re one of the richest writers in the world. You’ve seen more success in the last two decades than most see in two lifetimes. You’re always in demand. You get probably 100 calls a day and 1,000+ emails. Now imagine you woke up tomorrow and that was all true for you.

Except for you, it all happened overnight.

When you went to bed last night, you were still you, a struggling author just trying to get your shit together and sell some books. When you woke up, you are the most in-demand author this planet has ever seen. Everyone wants a piece of you. Everyone wants to work with you, hire you, pay you, call you, get your feedback, ask for your approval, have you represent their charity…

And since it happened overnight, you don’t have the support team or systems in place to handle the chaos, so you’re laying on your bed with thousands of unanswered emails and hundreds of unreturned phone calls… and all you can think is, “I wanted this? REALLY??”

If this happened, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. You wouldn’t be ready for it. You’d bust SO FAR past your Upper Limit that your subconscious would immediately find ways to sabotage everything so you can get back to a place where you feel safe and comfortable again.

This is why the pace at which things actually show up in your life is a blessing.

The pace is there to help you up-level gradually. So your mind and your capacity to hold on to the success is where it needs to be when the success shows up. 

That way you don’t sabotage it or wreck it with negative thoughts and old beliefs that you still have. Because you’ll have worked through that shit already and you’ll be to a place where you feel like you can handle the success you’re asking for.

You may not feel ready, but you feel capable. 

And that’s why you have to do your part—show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent—as well as trust in the timing of the Universe. It’s impossible for you to do those three things: show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent, and not get where you want to go.

IMPOSSIBLE. 

So if you know for certain that you’ll get there and your dream life will be your real life, why worry about the timing? Why stress yourself out trying to make things happen faster?

Just enjoy life, do you, and trust that as long as you keep going, the pieces of your dream life will continue to show up, until one day in the not too far off future, you’ll be living the dream life in your reality that you’ve only seen in your mind up ’till now.

Write with a purpose, live with intention,

 

 

P.S. The Story Revision Kit: Process + Strategy for Revising Your Novel is coming TOMORROW!!! Want it? Get on my email list here so you’re the first to know when it’s available (and you’ll also get a free eBook: The Bestselling Author Mindset Formula: How To Think You Way to #1).