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Trust Is A Key Ingredient For Manifesting Your Writing Dreams (And Dream Life)

The other night I rented an old romantic comedy on Amazon and decided to make some popcorn to go with it. I put a pot on the stove, dropped in a couple big scoops of coconut oil and then put the lid on to get the oil hot.

I let the oil heat for a few minutes and then I put the kernels in. Immediately they began heating up. The oil was bubbling, the kernels were turning a roasted color. Any minute now I’d have popcorn.

But then the kernels didn’t pop as fast as I thought they should.

I kept shaking the pot, hoping to stir the kernels around and get them hot enough to pop. But still nothing.

Nothing.

The kernels just kept on cooking, the oil getting hotter and hotter by the second.

Still, nothing.

Then I got annoyed and started yelling at the kernels. What the hell is wrong with you? Why aren’t you popping? You should be hot enough! The oil is bubbling like crazy. What the fuck?!

Still, nothing.

Then I shook the pot again. Stirring the kernels around while simultaneously telling them they should already be popping.

Still, nothing.

And then I realized–holy shit! This is a metaphor for LIFE!!

Often in life we have a dream or a goal and we declare it and start taking action and move in that direction. And yet nothing is happening. Or at least, it’s not happening at the speed WE think that it should.

So you say it’s not working and then you start to look for what’s wrong and what you should fix. And all the while your life kernels–your dreams, your goals, your desires–are heating up and getting ready to pop… but you get impatient and remove your energy from taking action and instead get caught in self-doubt and fear and procrastination and Resistance and worrying about whether you’re good enough.

But here’s the thing I know to be true about popcorn–and life–when the oil gets hot enough, the kernel gets hot enough, and when the kernel gets hot enough, it pops.

It has to. There’s no way around it. A corn kernel at a specific internal temperature will turn into popcorn. This is inevitable.

The same is true in life and in living your dreams.

If you know what you want and you commit to it and consistently take action and do the work and keep going and don’t let yourself be stopped by anyone or anything, you WILL get there. It’s inevitable.

But getting from where you are now–a kernel–to where you want to be–the popped corn–there has to be a level of trust there. You have to trust that if you go all in and show up fully and do the work that you will eventually get there.

You will. It’s inevitable.

Except the timing will never be what you think it will. When it happens and how it happens are totally out of your hands. The when and the how are up to the Universe.

Your job is the what and the why. Your job is to take baby-step actions, whatever ones you can come up with, in the direction you want to go. And as you do, trusting that what you want will eventually be yours.

And when you fully trust in the timing of your life and stop trying to rush things, what you want will happen a hell of a lot faster.

Right now it’s not happening as fast as you want because you’re constantly looking around for results and saying that it’s not working. You’re actually pushing it further off when you do that.

Because what you pay attention to and put your focus on will expand.

Keep focusing on it’s not working or it’s not happening fast enough and that’s what will keep expanding. Or place your focus on what you want and why you want it and on taking whatever actions you can from where you are and don’t worry about whether or not it’s happening fast enough.

As my mentor says, head down and do the fucking work.

As I stood there–FINALLY–watching the kernels turn into popcorn, I realized it was time to trust in the speed and timing of my life. Because it’s already perfect and divine.

We always think we should be further along than we are. This is part of being human and especially being humans who dream big and are driven to achieve.

But things take time. And you really wouldn’t want things to go any faster or you won’t be ready to handle it and you’ll go into self-sabotage mode.

It’s true.

You think it would be badass to just wake up tomorrow and be on The NY Times bestseller list. But for most writers, it wouldn’t be. Because they haven’t journeyed far enough yet to be ready for that kind of success.

If it happened overnight–the instant fame, the hundreds of emails and phone calls and guest appearances and traveling and whatever else comes with it–it would scare the shit out of you. And you wouldn’t be able to handle it.

It would make you run and hide. It would cause you to blow past your inner comfort zone and you’d sabotage it. It would be the end of who you are right now.

The Universe doesn’t want that for you.

So that’s why life is gradual. That’s why things take time to unfold. That’s why you see it in your head and feel it in your heart way before you see it in your physical reality.

Because you need time to get used to it. You need time to process each level before you get to the next one. You need time to work through all the things you need to learn and discover to be able to handle what’s next.

So when it does inevitably happen, you’re ready. You’re present. You’re able to accept it and receive it and hold on to it.

When the kernels finally pop, you’re ready for them.

And while it was heating up and doing its thing, you had time to gather a bowl and figure out what seasonings to put on it and make the spice mix. You’re prepared for its inevitable manifestation.

You do that with popcorn and you can also do it with life.

Figure out what you want. Commit to it. Then pretend it has already happened and ask yourself what you’d be doing and thinking and being. And then do, think and be that stuff RIGHT NOW.

No worrying about how long it will take. No second-guessing yourself or your actions. Just do the work and trust in the inevitable arrival of everything you dream of.

Dream life or bust,

 

 

#DreamLifeOrBust #DailyThinkDifferent

P.S. Doors to the Bestselling Author Mastermind are opening later this week!! And with it a story planning workshop that you don’t want to miss.

Get on my email list so you’re the first to know when the doors open–and you’ll also get a free copy of my eBook, From ‘Eh’ to ‘Awesome!’ The 9 Questions to Turn Your Idea Into An Actual Story: www.jenniferblanchard.net/awesome

“Why Would Anyone Care?” <---The Voice That Keeps You Playing Small

This morning I had a Divine Download for something really cool to create. I got excited about it and started making a whole page of notes for how I could do it and what it would be called.
 
And then that voice came up; that voice that comes up everytime I’m feeling good and clear and certain about what I’m doing…
 
“Why would anyone care? What makes you think you’re so damn special and that anyone would want to follow you or pay attention to you?”
 
That voice has shut down so many ideas and projects over the years. In my life and other peoples’ lives (maybe you can relate?).
 
Because why would anyone care, right? What makes you think any of your ideas are even valid or important or worth putting out into the world? What makes you think you’re good enough to do that or be that or have that?
 
I spent most of my life feeling not good enough. Bullied throughout my childhood and high school years, I just wanted to blend into the crowd and not stand out. I didn’t want people to pay attention to me, because all the bullying over the years programmed me to believe that standing out and being seen was a bad thing.
 
I still battle with the feeling not good enough thing, more often than I’d like to. But I’ve reprogrammed my beliefs around what it means to stand out and be seen.
 
Now I know that standing out and being seen means being able to help more people and make a bigger impact. It means getting my ideas, my stories, my message and my creations out in front of more people.
 
Even if you feel not good enough at times, that doesn’t at all mean your ideas aren’t valid or important or worth putting out in the world. It just means you’ve got subconscious programming going on that’s telling you your ideas aren’t valid or important or worth putting out there and you’re currently accepting those beliefs as true.
 
But here’s the thing… you weren’t born with those beliefs or that programming! You didn’t come into the world feeling not good enough or thinking your ideas weren’t valid or worth putting out there. In fact, it’s quite the opposite.
 
You were born feeling worthy. You were born feeling so much love for yourself and for everyone and everything around you. You were born with loads of creative ideas and a brilliant imagination that can create anything you want and more. You were born with a gift(s) that’s meant to be shared with the world.
 
THAT is who you really are. THAT is your TRUE NATURE.
 
It’s society and the media and the people around us and our life experiences that have programmed our true nature out of us.
 
When you were a kid, if you had an idea or wanted to create something, you just did it. You didn’t think about it. You didn’t agonize over whether or not it was worthy or worth putting out. You just drew the damn picture and made your mom put it on the fridge.
 
But now because of all the other voices around you, those ridiculous, unhelpful, negative thoughts come up… “why would anyone care? What makes me think this idea is any good? If I put it out there no one will pay attention to it anyhow. The world doesn’t need another book. I should probably just quit and go watch Netflix for the rest of my life.”
 
And that shit just isn’t necessary.
 
The only voice, the only opinion, the only thing that matters is YOU. What you think, what you feel, what you believe. That’s it.
 
If someone doesn’t like it, too fucking bad (or as my mom would say, TFB; she was using acronyms long before they became the “cool” thing).
 
So when an idea like the one I got this morning hits me, I run with it. Even with that voice popping up that says, “why would anyone care?” I’ve made it a core value in my writing business to act on Divine Downloads. (Notice I didn’t say question or judge or analyze… I said ACT!)
 
There’s a huge element of creativity that’s often forgotten about… the element of trust. You must have infinite trust that whatever idea or story came to you chose you for a reason and that it not only deserves your attention and effort, but it also deserves to be finished and put out into the world.
 
When I run with a Divine Download idea, I never know what’s going to happen. I never know how it’s going to turn out or how it will be received by my audience.
 
But I do the work, I finish it and I put it out there anyhow.
 
It’s not up to me to judge the idea. That’s not my job. My job is to channel the idea, the message, the story and be the creator who brings it to life in the physical world.
 
That is how I’m able to create so much stuff on a consistent basis. Because I no longer judge it. I no longer worry or criticize. I just do the work, put it out there and move on to the next thing.
 
This may not seem like a rational way to operate, and most of my business mentors have told me that I need to slow down and do less. But I can’t. Because slowing down and doing less means fewer creations and ideas and stories make it out into the world.
 
And I have way too many to let them sit inside my head and die a slow death.
 
So I push on. I create and I write and I unleash my creativity. And when the voices of negativity pop up, I deal with them and push on. And when the doubt and the fear pops up, I deal with it and then push on. And when [insert distraction or trigger] pops up, I deal with it and then PUSH ON.
 
That shit used to stop me. It used to make me procrastinate and resist doing the work and especially finishing. But that was also back when I used to question the speed at which I create and the amount of stuff I put out into the world on a daily, weekly, monthly basis.
 
Now I don’t question. I just act.
 
Do the work. Put it out there. Repeat.
 
And when it really comes down to it, the only thing that can actually stop you and keep you playing small and listening to those BS voices is YOU.
 
Write with a purpose, live with intention,
 
 
#DailyThinkDifferent #DreamLifeOrBust

 

P.S. If you’re ready to STOP playing small and START unleashing the stories and ideas and creations you have inside you, it’s time for you to join the Bestselling Author Mastermind–my high-level community and mentorship group for multi-passionate writers, authors and creators who want to create the habits, craft expertise, mindset, consistency and follow-through of a professional.
 

Accept the Speed and Keep Going…

Confession: I’m impatient as fuck.

When I finally decide that I want something, I want it NOW. I don’t want to wait for it. My creative juices go into overdrive trying to figure out how to get it NOW.

Maybe you can relate?

It’s the problem with being a multi-passionate writer who has big dreams to fulfill. Because there’s so much you want to do and achieve and be and have, and you think you need to have it all right now.

And so if it doesn’t show up right away, you think you’re doing something wrong. You worry that it will never happen for you. You tell yourself that maybe you’re not good enough or worthy enough to have it. Or, even worse, that it happens for everyone else, but it won’t happen for you.

Been there. Done that. Still do it at times. But the thing I’ve learned over my decade of being a writer online is this: it never happens as fast as you think it’s going to. 

And this is a good thing.

Huh? How can not getting what you want when you want it be a good thing?

Because if you got everything right now, all at once, right when you wanted it, chaos would ensue. A kind of chaos you’ve not yet experienced. 

Imagine waking up and having everything you’ve been asking for right there waiting for you. The body. The success. The money. Sounds like a dream, right? Maybe. Until the calls start. And the emails.

Oh, you don’t know about the calls?

What about the emails? Didn’t hear about those either?

OK, let’s back up for a second.

Imagine that you’re Nicholas Sparks. You’re one of the richest writers in the world. You’ve seen more success in the last two decades than most see in two lifetimes. You’re always in demand. You get probably 100 calls a day and 1,000+ emails. Now imagine you woke up tomorrow and that was all true for you.

Except for you, it all happened overnight.

When you went to bed last night, you were still you, a struggling author just trying to get your shit together and sell some books. When you woke up, you are the most in-demand author this planet has ever seen. Everyone wants a piece of you. Everyone wants to work with you, hire you, pay you, call you, get your feedback, ask for your approval, have you represent their charity…

And since it happened overnight, you don’t have the support team or systems in place to handle the chaos, so you’re laying on your bed with thousands of unanswered emails and hundreds of unreturned phone calls… and all you can think is, “I wanted this? REALLY??”

If this happened, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. You wouldn’t be ready for it. You’d bust SO FAR past your Upper Limit that your subconscious would immediately find ways to sabotage everything so you can get back to a place where you feel safe and comfortable again.

This is why the pace at which things actually show up in your life is a blessing.

The pace is there to help you up-level gradually. So your mind and your capacity to hold on to the success is where it needs to be when the success shows up. 

That way you don’t sabotage it or wreck it with negative thoughts and old beliefs that you still have. Because you’ll have worked through that shit already and you’ll be to a place where you feel like you can handle the success you’re asking for.

You may not feel ready, but you feel capable. 

And that’s why you have to do your part—show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent—as well as trust in the timing of the Universe. It’s impossible for you to do those three things: show up fully every single day, do what matters and be consistent, and not get where you want to go.

IMPOSSIBLE. 

So if you know for certain that you’ll get there and your dream life will be your real life, why worry about the timing? Why stress yourself out trying to make things happen faster?

Just enjoy life, do you, and trust that as long as you keep going, the pieces of your dream life will continue to show up, until one day in the not too far off future, you’ll be living the dream life in your reality that you’ve only seen in your mind up ’till now.

Write with a purpose, live with intention,

 

 

P.S. The Story Revision Kit: Process + Strategy for Revising Your Novel is coming TOMORROW!!! Want it? Get on my email list here so you’re the first to know when it’s available (and you’ll also get a free eBook: The Bestselling Author Mindset Formula: How To Think You Way to #1). 

Why You Need to Start Trusting the Process (And How To Do It)

NOTE: this is a guest post from Mary DeRosa Hughes of the Grateful Scribe

A few weeks ago, my best friend and fellow writer Kelly called me up on the verge of a panic attack. She was swamped with projects, when one of her clients came to her with an assignment she had no time for: writing employee profiles for a group of highly successful metropolitan realtors. Never one to disappoint a customer, she asked if I could pinch-hit for her.

I had room in my work schedule, so I accepted the assignment. After her breathing returned to normal, she gave me the details.

“They need a full page bio for each realtor. Twenty five of them. In five days.”

So it’s a tight timeline. 

“And you also have to interview everyone. ”

Now it’s a really tight timeline.

Then she hit me with the final piece: “Just a heads up:  they’re insanely busy people.  If you get five minutes of their time, that’d be a serious miracle. As in turning-water-into-wine kind of miracle.”

Uh oh.

Kelly was relieved, but my anxiety-fueled monkey mind was off to the races.

I have to track down twenty five real estate agents who barely have time to breathe, let alone talk to me. And if they do give me five minutes of their time, they’ll probably be hostile because they could have used those precious minutes to sell sixteen condo units. I’ll never get anything good from them, so the profiles will be horrible. Why did I say I would do this?

But then the chatter stopped. And I shifted from questioning my sanity to questioning my lack of faith, in myself and in the Universe.

I have been writing professionally for almost 20 years. I believe infinite wisdom is at work in everything. The Universe sent me this assignment for a reason.

So why do I think I can’t handle this?  I have to embrace it and trust the process.  Believing fully that everything will work out.

After pondering that for a moment,  I logged into my email, pulled up the contact numbers for every agent and started dialing.

My initial call was simply to set a time for us to chat. But surprisingly, quite a few of them agreed to let me interview them right on the spot, and they offered up some great info. Many of them even spent well over the coveted five minutes with me.
Several days later, I turned in the project, feeling not only relief, but a renewed sense of confidence, in both myself and the Universe.

Learning to trust the process is great for everything from supporting your work in the world to your mental and physical health. But what exactly can you do to snap into “trust autopilot” when faced with scenarios that are unfamiliar, nerve wracking or downright scary?

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

Inventory Your “Work Outs” (and I don’t mean time at the gym)
– How many times have things you initially doubted and stressed over actually worked out? Probably more often than not, right?

Keep a list of all the successes you’ve had when you just relaxed, took action and let the Universe orchestrate the “How.” When you feel like your sense of trust is headed for the exit, grab that list and read it.

Stop Fearing The Fear – As long as you are learning, growing and trying new things, you will encounter at least some level of fear at the outset of whatever you’re doing.

And contrary to what your churning stomach and racing heart may seem to indicate, you’re not going to die. Honestly.

You are actually becoming more alive by facing – and conquering – these uncomfortable feelings.

Curtail the “Cursed Hows” – You’ve set your intention. You’ve put positive energy around the situation. You believe that the Universe will deliver an awesome end result.

But…you can’t stop thinking of how it will all come together. Which people will or won’t cooperate? Where will the money come from? Is this going to take a week? A month? Forever?

When you catch yourself running this tape-loop in your head, stop.

Then remind yourself that you’re dealing with a powerful, loving,  unlimited creative force with riches and resources far beyond what you can imagine.  And all of them will be at your disposal the moment you choose to trust the process.

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What steps can you take to learn to trust the process in your own life?

About the Author:

About the Author: Mary DeRosa Hughes is a freelance writer and blogger based in Scottsdale, Arizona. She has been writing professionally for over 18  years, with experience ranging from corporate video scripts and motion picture screenplays to marketing copy and website content. Her short film Anniversary was an Official Selection of the 2013 Aesthetica Short Film Festival in York, U.K.  She is also working on the rewrite of her first fiction novel, and is excited to be releasing her second short film Waiting For Goodbye in the summer of 2016.

If you’re ready to trust the process and want to up-level your writing life and get serious about putting your words out into the world, check out the Bestselling Author Mastermind for high-level accountability and kick-ass motivation. 

Image courtesy of farhad pocha