You Have To Learn To Set The How Aside

Something I’ve gotten really good at over the years is being able to set the How aside when it comes to my dreams and desires and go for it anyhow. Sure, I have areas where it’s more challenging for me than in other areas, but overall, not knowing the How rarely stops me.

I’ve just always been a dreamer since I was a very young child, and I’ve always believed that I got to live my dreams (even if I have resistance to certain ones). One of the good things I was programmed with early on in life was to always follow my heart, and that has served me very well.

And when I found myself really caught up on trying to figure out How I was going to do something, to the point where I felt stuck or stagnant or like things were not working and not ever going to work, I’ve always just decided it was gonna have to work itself out. ‘Cause I’m not available to not have what I want. 

So when something I want isn’t happening and that goes on for an extended period of time, that’s when I say, “Too bad. It has to work out because I get to have this.” And then I literally stop myself from worrying about it. I give myself permission to have it, no matter How it comes to me.

And that’s when it shows up.

When I’ve stopped caring How. When I just believed I got to have it and How it came to me didn’t matter. When I gave myself permission to no longer worry about it and to trust that it was already being worked out by the Universe. 

Manifesting my divorce in January 2019 was one of those times. 

I’d been going back and forth inside myself for years on whether or not our relationship was the right one for me. Some days things were good, other days I couldn’t stop thinking about leaving. This went on for far too long and I’d had it.

So I finally just said–fuck it! I don’t care if we stay together or break up, so long as I’m happy and I get to have the kind of relationship that I desired. 

I set the How of figuring out whether our relationship was right for me or not aside and just trusted that the Universe would figure it out for me. 

I surrendered the How of getting to the outcome I desired and gave myself permission to just be happy and enjoy my life.

Then in early January 2019, less than six months from the day I set the How aside, my now-ex-husband asked me for a divorce and I got exactly what I asked for in the exact way I asked for it. 

And not once did I have to waste any time on figuring out How it was going to happen before it did.

You NEVER need to know How you’re going to do something or be something or have something. Not EVER.

But you DO have to learn how to set the How aside and trust.

Dream life or bust,

Dream life or bust,


P.S. And that’s exactly what my upcoming book, F*ck the How, is all about! I’m going to show you the ultimate How for every single thing you dream of and desire. 

If you want to be the first to know when the book goes live + get to see the behind-the-scenes, including a sneak peek of the cover design and clips from inside the book, go here: www.jenniferblanchard.net/fuckthehowbook


 Photo by Heather B-Yanaitis

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