I really needed to hear this one today. So I decided to write it for you. Because if I need to hear it, then it’s very likely that you do too.
If you choose to read on, that is.
This one isn’t for the thin-skinned. But it is for people like you and me who know you’re here for more and want to fully live before you die.
Often in our lives (and businesses) we think we have so many problems. We call those problems all different things:
> Not enough money
> Not enough time
> Not enough energy
> Lack of motivation
> Other people not behaving how we want them to
> Other people not being who we think we need them to be
> Being overwhelmed
The list of things you call your “problems” could go on forever.
But at the core of these problems are really two very simple things. Two things that, if you got honest with yourself, are creating all of the other things you’re experiencing as problems in your life (and/or business).
Those two things are:
2. Lack of discipline for doing what matters
And this is the truth that we hide from, because it lays all the responsibility for our problems right in our own hands.
You’re not broke–you’re just inconsistent and undisciplined when it comes to doing sales and money-making activities every day.
You’re not tired–you’re just inconsistent and undisciplined with exercising and eating the foods that energize you.
You’re not time-poor–you’re just inconsistent and undisciplined with living in the moment and using your time wisely.
You’re not lacking motivation–you’re just inconsistent and undisciplined around doing the things that actually matter.
I could go on.
I could continue going through the list I just made of all the so-called problems in your life and/or business. But it will all end with the same two core issues: inconsistency and lack of discipline.
Consistency and discipline for doing what matters are the real needle-movers in life and business.
And those are also the two areas where people–especially creative, multi-passionate people–struggle the most. It’s not always easy to be consistent and disciplined.
Well, I mean, it actually IS easy. In fact, VERY easy, to be consistent and disciplined.
You just get clear on what it is you need to be doing every day to move the needle in your life and/or business, freaking commit to doing those things, and then actually do them.
Day-in-and-day-out. No matter what is going on around you or in you. Period. End of story.
What makes it hard are the lies you’ve been programmed with and operating from for far too long now. What makes it hard are the fears you buy into about what it means to have a routine that you stick with (“but, OMG, won’t I get so bored?!”). What makes it hard are the stories you tell yourself to continue playing small in life.
What makes it hard is your belief that being consistent and having discipline will take your freedom away.
But it’s not hard to be consistent or to have discipline around doing what matters. Change can happen in an instant and it can stick.
Back in 2007, I had to endure insanely painful, multi-procedure dental work because I refused to floss my teeth. My dentist had told me from childhood that I needed to floss every night.
But I never listened.
I kept telling myself it would take too long to floss every night. That it was too hard to reach all of my teeth. That I was too tired from school and/or work.
What culminated was eight new cavities in teeth that already had cavity fillings. My dentist couldn’t fill the new ones without disrupting the old fillings, so my option was a whole bunch of crowns (painful and likely to need to be redone in years to come) or an expensive and painful procedure to drill out the insides of eight of my teeth–the ones with the old and new cavities–and put inlays in. The outer part of my tooth would still be real, but the insides wouldn’t be.
All the bullshit I’d convinced myself of that stopped me from flossing all those years had caught up with me.
I endured the painful, expensive procedure of getting inlays (’cause fuck crowns). It took longer and hurt way more than expected.
When all was said and done, my dentist told me the same thing my dentists had been telling me since I was a kid: you have to floss every night.
Well, the pain of this experience was bad enough that I definitely never wanted to repeat it. I went to the store that night, I bought some floss, and I’ve been flossing my teeth every single night since.
I’ve probably only missed like 5 nights total. Even on the nights when I’m super exhausted, fall asleep on the couch and wake up at 4 a.m., I STILL make myself brush and floss before I go to bed.
My consistency and discipline in this area was easy to implement and it happened fast.
It just took a whole lot of pain and expense to motivate me to do what I needed to. And that is totally unnecessary.
They say people will only change based on pain or inspiration, and most of the time it’s from pain. The pain of not having the thing they want; the pain of the consequences of their inconsistency and lack of discipline has gotten so bad that they’re finally willing to do what they must.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
You don’t have to wait until you’ve hit rock bottom before you do something different. The choice is always there, for you to be consistent and disciplined around doing what matters.
You’re free to choose.
Just remember that it’s always a CHOICE. A choice to show up every day. A choice to be consistent. A choice to do what matters. A choice to have discipline.
If you’re in a place in your life and/or business right now where you feel stuck, stagnant or like things aren’t working out, I can almost guarantee you’re not being consistent or disciplined when it comes to doing the needle-moving activities. If you were, you wouldn’t be feeling that way.
Feeling stuck, stagnant and/or like things aren’t working out are some of the worst feelings in the world.
And we get to choose how we feel. But sometimes to change the way something feels, you also have to change the actions associated with said things.
I used to feel stuck, stagnant and like things weren’t working when I went to the dentist. I was so good at brushing my teeth every morning and night. So why did I always have new cavities?
Those feelings made me start hating going to the dentist. I didn’t want to hear them tell me I had yet another cavity that would require yet another painful filling.
But I was feeling the stuck, stagnant, “this isn’t working” simply because I was being INCONSISTENT and LACKING DISCIPLINE around doing what mattered: flossing my teeth every night.
And as soon as I got consistent and disciplined around flossing, that’s when I stopped feeling stuck, stagnant and like things weren’t working. Because things started working.
I haven’t had any cavities since I became consistent and disciplined with my flossing. I stopped fearing my trips to the dentist. I started expecting the dentist to tell me I was cavity-free.
Consistency and discipline changed everything. And if it can do that with flossing my teeth, it can definitely do it with my life and with my business.
The same is true for you.
Being consistent and having discipline around doing what matters in your life and/or business will change everything too. It will stop you from feeling stuck, stagnant and like things aren’t working. It will shift you into a whole new energy and mindset.
And it will cause the results you dream of and desire to start appearing in your life.
It’s time to stop believing you have all these problems. You don’t.
You only have two problems: inconsistency and lack of discipline for doing what matters.
Change that and you will change everything.
Dream life or bust,
P.S. Don’t forget to join me on Mondays at 3 p.m. Eastern for the brand-new episode of my online radio show, 35 and Divorced: a guide to self-love, living your dreams and respecting yourself enough to stop settling. To listen in, download the W4WN radio app from the app store, or go to: www.w4wn.com and click “listen live.”